Names

Names greatly influence how we feel about people. We assume that a guy named "Nick" will be much cooler than a guy named "Norbert." This is terribly unfair, of course. That’s why nicknames are so important; nicknames give us the chance to rename someone based on their true character. After all, you know exactly what to expect before you meet a guy nicknamed "No-Neck."

Certain ancient cultures have known this for ages. A Native American tribal custom is to take a name later in life that signifies a certain talent or favorable trait. A name such as Running Wind means so much more than, say, Phil. Probably a guy named Running Wind runs fast or never stays anywhere long. Maybe he moves quietly and invisibly. Phil, who knows?

Once when he was traveling out west, my friend Alan met a real Native American in an airport. They chatted for a time and, according to Alan, found great common ground between them. Alan said they became so close, in fact, that this Native American revealed his own authentic tribal name to Alan, which is something done only with intimate friends, apparently. This man said his tribal name was 'Frequent Flyer.' What a coincidence to meet him in an airport, I thought.

Alan said that the Native American man then gave Alan his own tribal name, which according to this man, is another sign of intimacy. He named Alan “Squinting Nipples.” Alan, of course, was very proud of this.

When I asked Alan what Squinting Nipples meant he told me that the Native American man defined it as “he who sees with his heart.” That's nice. But I think the name means "he who bothers nice Native American person at the airport."