Pop Music

In evolution, species develop better survival skills because of natural selection. But the process is slow with most organisms. Humans, however, have developed rapidly because we are the only species that carefully considers mate selection. We choose with whom we want to reproduce because of the traits they possess, and we look for smart, capable, strong, attractive and caring. As a result, these traits dominate the species since they are most often reproduced and humanity improves with every generation. With elk, on the other hand, alive and in heat are suitable traits in a mate. And look where elk are.

I think about this every time I hear another love song on the radio. No matter how vapid the lyrics might be, no matter how clichéd its girl seeks boy theme, it's still about why humans are the most evolved species. When you think about it this way, pop stars really are the most important torch bearers for humanity’s continued development. To hell with scientists and philosophers, it's the pop stars whom epitomize humankind’s greatest achievements.

My friend Alan hates pop music. He’s convinced that “that crap” on the radio is shallow and base. I believe his opinion of pop music is the reason why he has remained childless all these years. While he dismisses the latest hits as “that crap” and listens to his “serious” music, I know that the top ten are actually messages compelling the listening public to go out there and improve our race.

Alan tries to get me to listen to more serious music but I’m afraid of it. If everyone listened to serious music humanity’s continued development would stall. Last time we argued over this, Alan called me an idiot. I told him that if he really cared about his fellow man he'd listen to more pop music. That's when he cried. I think he knows I'm right.